Now, let me start off this article by saying that I didn’t always hate Twitter. In fact, I once thought Twitter to be one of the coolest websites out there. I had heard of Twitter a couple years back, but didn’t really have any interest in getting one. Truth is, I didn’t really understand it. I would read my friend’s blog and there was little widget box labeled “Twitter” flashing short little sentences that my friend had written. I shrugged and thought it was just some weird widget thing. Through the years, I kept hearing about Twitter throughout the nerd community, yet still did not have one. I was finally convinced by my friend Shawn to get a Twitter on September 8, 2008. I liked the appeal and the fact that all my nerdy friends were making movie and comic book references, or just telling me that they were at Jack in the Box.
For a couple months, I Twittered just about everything, mostly whining about school and girls. What I liked about Twitter was that is was, well, a nerdy thing, really only known to those who spend long days on the computer or in front of a screen, or know all the names of the X-Men, or know that George Lucas did not direct The Empire Strikes Back. Then, all of the sudden, in February 2009, Twitter had an increase of 1,382%, making it one the fastest growing websites on the web.
This did not anger me too much until I was seeing headlines on the news about Twitter. What the fuck? That brings us to now, and I am just going to rant here, and yes, it’s going to be more than 140 characters. Let me tell you six reasons why I hate Twitter, here they are: Ashton Kutcher, Britney Spears, Terrel Owens, MC Hammer, Oprah, CNN. Why the fuck does Terrel Owens have a Twitter? I am sick and tired of hearing about Twitter on the news, like it is the new cool thing to do. I was watching one news broadcast and in an interview, the reporter said they had “a slew of questions from Twitter.” What the fuck? That’s fucking stupid. And oh God why does BILL O’REILLY have a Twitter?! Fucking why?! Suddenly everyone I know has a Twitter. Now, I know I might sound like an asshole, thinking that only nerds are allowed to get one, but I am always pissed when something nerdy becomes mainstream.
Like jokes about the Zombie Apocalypse. . .why are fucking preppies and bros making jokes about the Zombie Apocalypse?! I want to know just how many of those preppy people have EVEN SEEN a zombie movie. If I were to mention “Romero” or “Resident Evil,” would they know what I was talking about? And now there’s a book called “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies,” where Zombies are added to Jane Austen’s book for comedic purposes. But what the fuck? Why have zombies become so fucking mainstream? It really kills how cool they used to be. Give us back our zombies. What’s going to be popular next, shitty horror B-movies and Nerdcore hip hop? I’ll be fucking damned.
So yea, I don’t know what else to say here, except that I am saddened by the nerd-loss of Twitter and Zombies. Zombies might fade out and become cool again, but who knows? With nerd-culture rising, we might be seeing many of our loved interests becoming mainstream. Twitter continues to piss me of because of how much it is on the news. No, msnbc, I don’t want to follow you on Twitter. And who the fuck in world would want to follow Emeril Legassi?! This is fucking stupid.
Rammfan518 out
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